It's all very upsetting

I'm having one of those days where everything is upsetting. Or extra upsetting. 


I lost 3 lbs, which started the day off right (35 is the new total) but ... I went to bed late. And I didn't go to the gym last night. And I had a donut this morning. And two fun-sized candy bars this afternoon. And those people on The Biggest Loser somehow manage to lose 5 - 9 lbs EVERY WEEK. So I'm a little down on myself right now, and panicking at how close everything suddenly is. Beth & John visit in 2 weeks. I visit John in 5 weeks. Greece is in 10 weeks. And Germany is in 15. Eek. And eeeek and eeeeeeeek. 


Found out today I can't go to the Baccalaureate ceremony. Well. Technically I can go of course, but I can't process in with the rest of the graduates. Why not? Since I'm not walking in Saturday I didn't order a cap & gown (I did, of course, pay for one. Sweet.), and to be in the processional you have to be kitted out. 


And I'm arguing with Peter. As I do when I'm overtired. 


And it seems like all of a sudden there are these great opportunities for growth in the company, and I have to keep reminding myself: I don't care. I'm going to be doing something else entirely and I'm going to grow in new and unforeseen ways. I still feel left out.




Anyway, the Baccalaureate deal will simplify my siblings' visit, since it means we're not trying to spend a day at Universal, going to my apt, changing clothes and driving an hour to Deland. On the other hand, I completely overlooked that weekend is Mother's Day, this year! Which means no brunch on Sunday, as well as making time to call our Mom. Not that the 2nd part is particularly onerous. Still somehow upsetting, though. Yay.


Also: despite the no-go on the baccalaureate, I'm still signed up for the dinner this coming Saturday, which will be solely people from my program, vs. a bunch of random college kids! Would've been nice to see Josie, though. 




The gym tonight will be good for me. I think I'll put some extra effort into the Pilates, to start progressing from beginner to intermediate (which basically means straight legs). I may through is some strength machines after, too. We'll see.